My mother is very skillful.

My mother is very skillful.

She can make just about anything in the world for me.

She's a good artist, too, and she'd always draw something when I badgered her.

There wasn't ever a conscious decision that I would become as good an artist as she was; it was just a natural goal.

There wasn't ever a conscious decision that I would become as good an artist as she was; it was just a natural goal.

As far as I can remember, I never had a father.

I got teased about that pretty much all my life, but... so long as Mother was there, I didn't mind.

Hikaru, your mom's a real good painter, isn't she?

Must be nice~

I-I guess so...

Are you an artist, too, Hikaru? Show us!

Hmmmm......

You're actually not that good.

W, well... no, not yet! But I'm going to keep practicing, and some day I'll be just as good as Mother, you'll see!

A Bright Canvas in the Color of Cowardice First Part The Japanese verb for "be bright" is "hikaru", same as the girl's name. Pretty sure its usage in the title is wordplay, and translated accordingly.

That was in junior high.

That was in junior high.

As a senior in high school,

I painted daily. Sometimes I'd leave the results lying around and Mother'd get angry,

but the joy of painting was praise enough to keep me going. My painter's callus grew larger and harder by the day. A callus developed along the length of the middle finger, from holding a brush all the time.

My pictures had won several awards. On top of that, my homeroom teacher and all my friends said I was great.

My pictures had won several awards. On top of that, my homeroom teacher and all my friends said I was great.

But for some reason, I could never get a word of real praise from Mother.

...I think it's very nice.

Whatever I showed her, that was as much as she'd say.

You know, I'd... like to go into painting for a living...

My guidance counselor thinks I could do it, too. He's been looking into things for me...

What are you talking about? This isn't the time to keep playing around.

What are you talking about? This isn't the time to keep playing around.

Wh-- uh... no no, it's not like that at all. I really mean...

And that's any better? I think it's past time you took a break from painting.

T-took a break?

T-took a break?

You've improved greatly over these two years, can't you be happy with that? And then there's something about a university that I just cannot seem to grasp... OTL

Wait, wait, of course I want to go to university, but... my painting...

Hikaru.

Do you enjoy painting? Then that's fine.

Do you enjoy painting? Then that's fine.

Paint in your spare time. But this isn't something worth taking so seriously. This is...

"This is..." what?!

"This is..." what?!

I, I wanted to be as good as you... to be... a good painter...

The world is full to the brim with "good painters".

The world is full to the brim with "good painters".

You just don't understand, Hikaru.

......is this about money? Because I'll work! I'll work, while I study painting!

I'm not going to make a burden of myself! So--

I'm not going to make a burden of myself! So--

That you love it so much is only more of a reason...

...that this is the time to give it up.

...that this is the time to give it up.

There's just nothing outstanding about being a good painter. It's hopeless, Hikaru.

There's just nothing outstanding about being a good painter. It's hopeless, Hikaru.

There's just nothing outstanding about being a good painter. It's hopeless, Hikaru.

...you still liked to paint even after you'd grown up, didn't you...?

You used to paint when I was small, right? So what is it that you're so afraid of now?

I'm not like you, Mother. I'm not going to stop at just being a "good" painter.

I may still be just an amateur now, but... someday, this is how I'll make my living.

"Someday", when?

"Someday", when?

Tell me, Hikaru: when is "someday"?

Tell me, Hikaru: when is "someday"?

Uh...

Why is she being so strict about this...?

Why is she being so strict about this...?

That's...

I thought she'd be more co-operative... I mean, this is something that I love, shouldn't she be supporting me...?

I thought she'd be more co-operative... I mean, this is something that I love, shouldn't she be supporting me...?

Mother, I am not angry. But, until just now, I was feeling pretty good about the future, and I'd rather not think about that.

Hikaru, are you listening? Where are you going when it's just getting dark? Hikaru!

Mother doesn't understand how I feel! This is a serious topic, it deserves serious discussion!

I thought Mother loved painting, too. I knew she did. I believed it. And yet...

I thought Mother loved painting, too. I knew she did. I believed it. And yet...

Hikaru, this picture's incredible!

Kurihara's got a painter's callus, so it figures she's great!

You must be painting every day, huh?

Oh, no, I just like it, is all...

That you keep at it is a talent itself. Don't give up!

I take pride in the praise I get from my classmates and teachers.

I take pride in the praise I get from my classmates and teachers.

I'd paint anyway, but after all, everybody likes to be praised. But, Mother...

Maybe Mother just hates my paintings...?

Maybe Mother just hates my paintings...?

What if I'm really just a born amateur, and any really skilled painter would laugh at what I've done?

Ah...

What's this... one of my paintings...?

I should take this back home... getting tired, anyway...

I should take this back home... getting tired, anyway...

I'd been walking aimlessly with my eyes on the sidewalk.

I looked up to find myself facing a snack stand sign in an unfamiliar back alley.

I had to be a contender for the oldest "lost child" on record.

I had to be a contender for the oldest "lost child" on record.

I'll call Mother! This can't really be too far from home...

Out of Range

That CAN'T be right...! Okay, calm down, just find a police box...

If I don't make it back home before sundown, Mother's going to be so worri--

If I don't make it back home before sundown, Mother's going to be so worri--

Oh! Sorry!

Sorry, totally my fault!

Sorry, totally my fault!

I just sent it flying, didn't even think to look first...

I just sent it flying, didn't even think to look first...

Oh... well, no harm done. Say, uh, you wouldn't know where there's a police box nearby, would you?

A police box? Why? There been a crime?

A police box? Why? There been a crime?

Huh? N-no, it's nothing like that...

Um... it's kind of embarrassing, but I'm actually a little lost... I'm trying to get to Hinobara...

Um... it's kind of embarrassing, but I'm actually a little lost... I'm trying to get to Hinobara...

Hinobara? My house is right by there, I can take you myself, no trouble!

I don't recognize that uniform, so I guess you don't go to school around here. To think, a "lost child" at your age! Ahahaha!

I don't recognize that uniform, so I guess you don't go to school around here. To think, a "lost child" at your age! Ahahaha!

Ah... well, I guess so, yeah...

What is it about this girl... just seeing her smile takes a load off my shoulders...

What is it about this girl... just seeing her smile takes a load off my shoulders...

So, um... you made all those paper airplanes?

Yep.

And you just throw them?

Yep.

Yep.

Strange girl...

I figured, if I'm going to throw them away, just crumpling them up and tossing them in a bin wasn't a very heroic end, so I came up with this to give them a proper send-off!

I figured, if I'm going to throw them away, just crumpling them up and tossing them in a bin wasn't a very heroic end, so I came up with this to give them a proper send-off!

Throw them away...?

Oh, there's something painted on the inside...

Mhm.

And afterwards, I toss 'em all so I can start all over!

And afterwards, I toss 'em all so I can start all over!

You mean... you painted them?

And now you're throwing them all away?

And now you're throwing them all away?

'Bout the size of it!

This technique... it's really good... how does she make the colors like that...?

Throwing this way, it's... it's sacrilege!

Throwing this way, it's... it's sacrilege!

Y-you don't have to do this! I'll take them!

Y-you don't have to do this! I'll take them!

Ehh? What brought this on?

You're kinda strange...

You're kinda strange...

But it's no good. They gotta be tossed.

...still, that you'd make that offer... thanks.

Are you going to paint any more?

Are you going to paint any more?

...mmm, I'd like to, but it's probably impossible.

But why not!? You're really good!

But why not!? You're really good!

The world's fair rotten with folks at my level.

And there's as many of them as will never get any better as stars in the sky.

And there's as many of them as will never get any better as stars in the sky.

...so, you're just going to give up? Doesn't that seem strange?

Isn't this something you want to do?

That's not the whole of it. It's my mom.

That's not the whole of it. It's my mom.

My father always says, you should do what feels best to you.

If I fail at this, there's nothing coming after.

This'd be fine if we had money to fall back on, but we don't. Father never does worry much about that sort of thing.

You can be happy enough getting married and living an ordinary life, right?

You lack self-confidence, and blame it on your father... that's what I'm hearing.

......yep.

......yep.

I'm just... being a coward!

It's really got nothing to do with my father. I know that.

So long as there's anyone above me, I can blame them for my failures.

So long as there's anyone above me, I can blame them for my failures.

I don't hold any delusions about that.

Just forget about your family for a minute. What about yourself?

Just forget about your family for a minute. What about yourself?

Don't you like painting? Wouldn't you rather keep on doing it?

If I didn't, I'd just burn the things. But that'd just be a start.

If I didn't, I'd just burn the things. But that'd just be a start.

Tons more at home, 'cause I keep making them faster than I can toss 'em out.

To love something this much, to give your whole life over to it, that takes courage... just liking it ain't enough.

To love something this much, to give your whole life over to it, that takes courage... just liking it ain't enough.

You have to recognize this, and give it up... before it puts a burden on everyone around you.

Someone else said the same thing to me... just recently...

Someone else said the same thing to me... just recently...

What is this...

Oh yeah? They were probably a coward, too, then.

Oh yeah? They were probably a coward, too, then.

I swear I've seen her somewhere before... I know this person.

But who is she? Who?

Oh, wait, did you ever tell me your name?

Oh, wait, did you ever tell me your name?

Oh, it's... Hikaru.

Hikaru? That's a nice name.

Hikaru? That's a nice name.

I'm Kurihara Chie! Chie = "thousand pictures". Just thought you'd like to know.

Looks like we go to different schools, but good to know you!

Looks like we go to different schools, but good to know you!

Seems like we've gone from one strange topic to another since we've met, sorry 'bout that.

No, no... I should apologize for prying...

No, no... I should apologize for prying...

No, no... I should apologize for prying...

Nah, when you start talking about things you don't normally say to anyone, it all kinda comes out at once.

Nah, when you start talking about things you don't normally say to anyone, it all kinda comes out at once.

This girl whom I'd met in an unfamiliar back alley

just happened to be struggling with the exact same dilemma as me.

just happened to be struggling with the exact same dilemma as me.

In regards to our dreams, we were servile and cowardly, unable to advance a single step.

With nothing but a wry smile, she spoke easily with me about her uncertain future.

With nothing but a wry smile, she spoke easily with me about her uncertain future.

This girl...

Do you like to paint, too, Hikaru?

Do you like to paint, too, Hikaru?

Do you like to paint, too, Hikaru?

...yeah...

...with the same name as my mother.

...with the same name as my mother.

A little more to come ▼

A little more to come ▼