Hey, hey, listen to me! Promise you won’t laugh, okay? This isn’t just some delusion, it’s the truth! So, you know how they say Gensokyo is where “things forgotten by the Outside World drift to?” Well, actually, it’s a dumping ground for failed experiments! Humans from the Outside World shove in everything that science, history, or religion couldn’t handle. Gods, yokai, all of them, once people stop believing in them—toss! Off they go to Gensokyo! It’s basically a mouse cage for experiments! And you know the Great Hakurei Barrier? That’s not just some barrier! It’s actually an observation device that makes people outside forget. The barrier manipulates outside awareness so people go, “Oh, right, yokai don’t exist.” In other words, Gensokyo is the core hub of a worldwide brainwashing system! And here’s the really scary part, the Lunar Capital! The moon people always go on about “immortality” and “hating impurity,” but in reality the Lunar Capital is just a satellite base built to monitor all of Gensokyo! That’s why Eientei exists—it’s literally a spy outpost of the Moon! Yagokoro Eirin has been monitoring Gensokyo for centuries! And then there’s the Scarlet Devil Mansion! That’s hiding a foreign-world weapon that fell here from the outside! I mean, isn’t it weird that vampires, Western yokai, suddenly show up in Gensokyo? Obviously, they were brought in as “batteries to power magical weapons!” Remember the Scarlet Mist incident? That was just a weapons malfunction test! But the scariest one of all is, the Hakurei Shrine Maiden! She’s not just some shrine maiden! She’s actually the biological key to sustaining the barrier! That’s why in every generation a daughter of the Hakurei family is chosen, to fuse with the barrier itself. And if she dies? Boom, Gensokyo itself blows up! That’s why all the incidents keep happening: they’re management programs to wear her down and break her will! …See? See!? You’re laughing, right? But don’t you think this could really be true!?