Whoa!! It's Santa!

Ho ho ho!

How would you like my autograph, young lady?

I don't want an autograph. Just fork over my presents.

I know! I'll give you my autograph as a present!

Santa

Claus

I already told you I didn't want it, you fat lard!!

How dare you scoff at my kindness!

Don't forget: I know where you live.