The answer is neither.

Stop it! That is not funny...

You use a masculine tone.

If you have studied abroad in America for a long time, then surely you must have gotten used to their partial pronunciation, and it should not have appeared in your wordings.

That means that you never had the chance to learn gender-neutral words.

The only reason for that is that you have learned English in a closed environment from very small number of men.

Or in your case, from Arsenius.